A Twisted Hansel and Gretal

This fable is about con artists Heineken and Pretzels and their attempt to pull a fast one on Emma Thinkonafeet. Heineken and Pretzels are one sophisticated operation involved in separating wealthy individuals from their fortunes. Heineken has a wealth of knowledge covering all kinds of investments and opportunities. Pretzel on the other hand is one smooth talker, very persuasive in her delivery. Together they have had many successful extractions as they called their con operations. Their research of the target is thorough and meticulous. Facts like age, where the target lives, habits, movements and most importantly the nature of the targets investments are investigated. They can afford to spend as much time as needed to get a full idea of what they are dealing with because the returns are substantial.

Emma Thinkonafeet, an elderly lady, is an extremely well off individual having inherited all of her late husbands investments including artworks, stamps coins and Persian rugs. Her knowledge of these instruments had grown with their increasing value over the years. She helped her husband in his stockbrokerage business and had kept the office as that seemed easier than moving everything. This is where she spends a good proportion of the day maintaining the essence of the fortune. She keeps in touch with many of the clients and other stockbrokers and she receives many calls soliciting investment opportunities. All of this keeps her engaged and active and quite honestly she enjoys it immensely.

Heineken and Pretzels completed their research. They are focused on some artwork, a little known group of three paintings whose value was greater than the sum of the parts. It was done to commemorate the 1913 USA Open. Francis Ouimet was the first amateur to win the Open. He won it in a playoff against Harry Vardon and Ted Ray. The paintings of Vardon and Ray are registered in the name of Emma’s stockbrokerage business. For the life of them they could not trace the Ouimet painting. This prompted a plan of action. Pretzel became an expert in the group of three paintings and especially that of Ouimet while Heineken poured through databases to determine the technical and styles the artist used. They will approach Emma to see if she is interested in obtaining the Ouimet painting thereby gaining all three.

When Emma received the call from Pretzels she was surprised but something caught her attention so she agreed to see them. A time and date were arranged. After the introductions and small talk they asked if they could admire the Vardon and Ray paintings going to great lengths to impress Emma with their knowledge about the group of three paintings. They told Emma they knew where the Ouimet painting was and for the right price they could get it for her. Emma was really interested now. Of course she wanted to see it for herself.

Heineken and Pretzels were prepared for this and had made arrangements with an art dealer to obtain the painting on loan which they showed to Emma. They began to negotiate details of the proposed transaction. In order for Emma to pay a deposit they gave her the banking details and she wrote a cheque for the deposit amount.

While Heineken and Pretzels were high fiving down the street Emma was on the phone to the tax authorities and police. She knew they are con artists because the original Ouimet painting was hanging on her dining room wall at home. Heineken and Pretzels spent a good time in jail and were ordered to complete thirty hours of community service per week after their jail time.