The Fly

It was raining. “Out of control rain,” said Mrs T to Mr T who was sitting behind the paper at the breakfast table. The paper crackled as he peeked at her.

“It is?”

“Oh! Where have you been Mr T? Honestly have you ever seen the rain coming down like this? There aren’t enough buckets.”

Mr T looked out the window, bolted up, “Gotta close the bedroom window Mrs T,” he yelled over his shoulder and headed for the stairs.

Mrs T was shacking her head at Mr T’s antics. She said to herself, “I can laugh or cry…The ringing of her phone interrupted her thought. It was a friend calling.

“Hi Syl! What’s up? she answered.

“Listen honey. I checked the whether radar. There is a break in forty five minutes for an hour or so. What you say we go for that walk we promised each other? I can meet you at your house.”

This she told to Mr T when he returned to finish his breakfast coffee. “Stay dry then and have fun!” he said a little too nonchalantly causing Mrs T’s raised eyebrows to trigger a little concern in her mind.

The doorbell rang. “That’s Syl” said Mrs T. She stepped outside holding the door then the firm sound of the lock closing caused Mr T to lookup.

That is when the flies flew in. It was a swat team sent by ground control to monitor concerns over a report of a deranged man threatening to swat one of their own.

“Ground control all flies are in position as planned,” said Major Tom.

“Excellent. Now send fly Ninja to begin the show,” came the reply. “Keep us posted.”

Out of the corner of his eye Mr T noticed a fly moving behind his half filled cup of coffee. The paper crackled as Mr T swiped his paper, sending the cup of coffee flying over the table’s edge. He cringed as the crashing cup broke into pieces on the tiled floor. It was his favourite cup.

For the record Major Tom noted; Instigator has red face and is angry.

It went from bad to worse.

Pat-a fly sent to reconnoiter Instigators movements perched on the side of a cupboard. She reported to Major Tom how the spilled coffee and broken cup were cleaned up to the chant, “Gonna swat a fly..hey hey.”

The kettle was boiling, whistling blue murder right below Pat-a fly. It was her demise. The Instigator encourage by the sight of a fly on it’s back with legs in the air went berserk. He found the fly swatter.

The scene that greeted Mrs T as she opened the door sent her berserk. The chandelier lay shattered on top of Mr T who appeared unconscious., A fly swatter was clutched in his hand. In slow motion she walked through the house. Every room had evidence of a struggle. Curtains lay awry ripped from their rods. The TV screen was a gaping hole. There was more but all too much for Mrs T. Her body was found next to Mr T.

On their way out the swat team placed an anonymous call.

After the police had left the neighbours told reporters how the T’s were led away in an ambulance tied down on stretchers.

*****

Mr T felt a violent shaking, It was Mrs T saying, “Come on time to rise and shine. You were talking in your sleep.., “Gonna swat that fly…or something. Anyway it’s raining buckets full.”

“It is!”

*****

#farce #satire